Elrics at Hogwarts
by River Eynaea
Summary: FMA x Harry Potter. Ed and Al come to Hogwarts as students. Need I say more? I can't just blurt out the plot, what fun is there in that?
1. The Suit of Armor

**Chapter 1: The Suit of Armor**

The Hogwarts train sped through the open countryside. Outside the roar of the wheels on the track was nearly deafening. Inside was no different. The train was filled with the noise of Hogwarts students causing all around mayhem.

Sparks erupted without warning in one compartment, while the occupants of another, three doors down, were enveloped in a cloud of some unidentifiable substance. Girls were tittering behind their hands, pretending not to notice the antics of boys outside their door and many students were loudly showing off new spells or trinkets they had amassed over the summer.

Even though the chaos outside was reaching the brink of total anarchy, one compartment on the train remained as quiet as a grave. Inside was a massive, bulky suit of armor and a sleeping figure in a blood-red cloak. The armor blocked any view of the person's face and was a subject of great interest to the students passing by.

One lone girl was pushing her way through the students in the passageway. Her bushy, brown hair and the stack of books in her arms instantly identified her to every student to whom she politely (if a bit hurriedly) said "Pardon me." She peeked into every compartment, searching for her friends.

The girl came to the silent, aforementioned compartment and stuck her head in. Her disturbed expression matched her thoughts. _Why in the world would a student bring a humongous suit of armor to Hogwarts?_ There were plenty there already.

She stared at the armor for a few moments. She could have sworn she saw the helmet slightly turn in her direction with a light glowing behind the empty eyeholes. It was eerie, but she dismissed it as merely the train jostling. After all, no _normal_ student could fit in a suit of armor that large.

With one final glance at the sleeping figure, who had just emitted a loud snore, the girl left the compartment and returned to searching. Five glass doors down, she found the compartment she had been searching for.

"Hermione!" exclaimed two voices as she came in.

"Hello, Harry," Hermione said happily to a boy with unruly, black hair and round glasses. "Hello, Ron," she said to a tall boy with ginger hair and freckles. "I've been searching all over for you two!" She set her books down on the opposite bench and sat down next to them. "How are you? I haven't gotten any owls from _either_ of you recently."

Ron sank deep into his seat. "Errol had an… accident. He flew into the middle of one of Fred and George's 'experiments' and he's been cross-eyed for a long time now. Mum was furious and she's been borrowing Percy's owl since then. But only when it's _absolutely_ necessary because Percy's a prick."

Harry gave Ron a sympathetic glance and turned to Hermione. "You can probably guess why you didn't get any letters from me. Uncle Vernon boarded up my windows after a neighbor saw Hedwig flying into my room."

"Well, at least we're going back to Hogwarts," Hermione said cheerfully. She settled down and picked up one of her books. Immediately, her focus was glued to the pages.

Harry and Ron returned to their game of Boffers and Buffers. It was a game with two sets of cards, each card containing a magical figure or creature. Harry was blue and he set down a gnome card.

"Fear me!" bellowed the gnome.

Ron scoffed and placed down a wizard card next to Harry' card. The wizard pulled a wand out of his pocket as the gnome stepped out of view and came back with a mace nearly twice its size. The wizard's jaw dropped. He sent a spell over, but the gnome dodged it and threw the mace. In a flash of smoke, the wizard disappeared.

"Boffers!" said Harry. "That was fast." The mace disappeared and he put his card back in the bottom of the draw pile. The next time the card showed up, it would have only the gnome on it until he set it down with Ron's card. Then a brand new weapon would appear.

"Buffers," Ron said gloomily. "Why can't any of my cards have a mace?"

The sliding door to their compartment opened. A worried looking boy stepped in, a toad in his hands and a copious amount of periwinkle dust covering him head to toe. It floated off him every time he took a step.

"Hi guys. Would any of you happen to have a really good cleaning spell?

"Blimey, Neville!" Ron said incredulously. "How'd you manage to do that?"

Hermione finally looked up from her book. "Oh!" she exclaimed. "What happened?"

Neville looked even gloomier. "Seamus gave me a spell. He swore it would make my new plant grow faster. I didn't even know Feathered Bay Blooms had a defense mechanism!"

Hermione stood up and grabbed her wand out of her pocket. "I know a good spell. Come on, let's go help."

The three spent the rest of the train ride helping the victims of the explosion. When the train was almost to Hogwarts they changed into their robes and got ready to go.

As they stepped off the train, Hermione remembered the suit of armor she had seen earlier. She looked around, but she saw nothing. Maybe it was still on the train. But what first-year would bring a suit of armor? And the owner would definitely be a first year; no returning student would bring their own, personal, giant suit of armor to Hogwarts.

With a frustrated sigh Hermione stopped searching and stepped onto one of the carriages that took students to Hogwarts. She pushed her questions to the back of her mind and instead wondered why boys liked violent games so much. It was appalling, the things that could entertain them. Absolutely appalling.

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><p>Comments greatly appreciated! Thanks for reading!<p> 


	2. Shadows

**Chapter 2: Shadows**

Two figures stood in the shadows near the head of the train, the farthest from the crowd of students.

"Did you _see_the things pulling those carriages? They're like horribly mutated skeleton beasts! What kind of a school is this?"

"It's a very good one. We'll learn a lot here."

"Still, I'm _not_ riding in anything pulled by one of those. We can walk. I'd rather postpone the idiotic questions everyone will ask when they see us."

"But big brother, won't we be late?"

"Nah. It'll make for a grand entrance."

"Alright... I hope you know what you're doing."

"_Of course I do_. C'mon, they're all gone, let's go."

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><p>Short but mysterious.<p>

If you're smart I bet you're realizing this is written in anticipation of readers who have read HP but not FMA. But that makes it more fun for people familiar with FMA.


	3. Elric

**Chapter 3: Elric**

Harry stepped back into the hallways of Hogwarts. No place had ever felt more like home.

Students filed through the hallways and into the Great Hall. Ghosts floated above their heads, chatting cheerfully about death and other such topics.

Allowing himself to be moved by the crowd, Harry came into the Great Hall. The candles floating high above the tables cast warm light over the colossal room. Students were finding seats at their house tables, which were each decorated with their house colors- blue and bronze for Ravenclaw, green and silver for Slytherin, yellow and black for Hufflepuff, and red and gold for Gryffindor.

Harry seated himself between Ron and Hermione at the Gryffindor table. Two red-headed twins across the table spoke up.

"'Ello, Harry!" said the twin on the left.

"How was your summer?" said the other twin.

"Did you blow anything up?"

Harry shook his head. "No explosions. Nothing. I was actually ignored most of the time."

Fred and George shook their heads. "Tragic. Absolutely tragic."

"How could you, Harry?"

"We expect so little from you-"

"-and you just go and break our hearts like that."

"We were able to blow up precisely twenty-three things this summer."

"Testing our new inventions, y'see."

"We'll be having a demonstration later in the common room."

"Stop by and have a look-see."

"We'll even give you a discount."

Just then, the final professor arrived at the front of the room, seating themselves at the long staff table. The room quieted and the back doors opened.

A long line of children in black robes entered the banquet hall led by Professor McGonagall, a strict woman with her hair pulled back into a tight bun. The first-years looked around with wide, scared eyes at the ceiling high above and at the older students around them. Harry noted the nervous looks on their faces and remembered that he had looked the same way at his sorting ceremony years before.

Professor McGonagall set the Sorting Hat on a stool in front of the staff table. It was an ancient wizard's hat, used to sort Hogwarts students into their proper houses. And with faded colors and ragged patches sewn on it, the hat's age was definitely showing.

The Sorting Hat lifted its point and opened a mouth-like slit wide. Then, it began to sing.

**...*…**

The song was mysterious and confusing, as per usual, but the students nevertheless applauded as the Sorting Hat finished its song. Professor McGonagall then stepped forward with a long roll of parchment and the room quieted in anticipation.

"When I call your name, place the hat on your head and seat yourself on the stool to be sorted. When you know which house you are, you may leave to sit at your table." McGonagall read off the first name on the list. "Addison, Veronica."

A tiny girl with glasses stepped forward to the stool, placed the hat on her head, and sat down. A moment later it yelled "RAVENCLAW!"

The girl removed the hat from her head and ran blushing to the Ravenclaw table, where she sat down amidst wild cheers.

Next was a young boy named "Alther, John." The Sorting Hat proclaimed him "HUFFLEPUFF!"

"Axley, Theodore," became a Gryffindor, "Bennet, Diana" became another Ravenclaw, and "Crossley, Falcon" and "Crossley, James" were both named Slytherin.

The rest of the children were sorted in turn, and each went to sit down with their new houses.

Slytherin house was gloating over getting the tallest first year of the bunch. He was a full six inches taller than the rest. Fred and George kept having to send taunts over, just so Gryffindor could keep face. Or, at least, that was their excuse.

The final cheers died down as Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts, stepped up to a podium shaped like an owl with outstretched wings.

Dumbledore wore half-moon glasses that perched on edge of his crooked nose and had a long, silver beard. His robes were a deep midnight-blue that seemed to mirror that of the night sky. His smile, though small, showed his immense joy as he looked over the students.

"Welcome back to Hogwarts, eager students. I apologize sincerely, but the time to eat has not yet arrived. We have one more matter to address before dinner can be served." He paused.

The students began whispering quietly amongst themselves.

"What matter?"

"Please don't let it be another tournament!"

"I'm starved!"

Dumbledore continued. "We at Hogwarts are to be hosts to two new students this year."

"I hope they're not Bulgarian," Ron commented to Harry.

"Hush!" Hermione whispered.

"These two students are coming to Hogwarts for the purpose of personal research. They have never attended a wizarding school before, but I assure you that they will have no trouble catching up."

_Catching up?_ Harry thought.

"Naturally, they shall be sorted into Houses just as each of you were. They will then both join fifth year in their studies."

Professor McGonagall walked up to Dumbledore just then. She spoke something quietly to him and he looked surprised. With only a slightly concerned look, he turned back to the students.

"It appears that we currently do not know their whereabouts. One moment of patience, students." He stepped away from the podium and walked over to the staff table.

The Great Hall erupted into chatter.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione turned to each other.

"What sort of people do you suppose they are?" Ron inquired.

"Well, obviously they can't be Squibs," Hermione mused, "but they've never attended a wizarding school before... and yet they will be able to easily catch up to fifth year studies? Are they some sort of wizarding prodigies?"

"What about them being here for research purposes? What does that mean?" Harry questioned.

"Sounds rather dodgy to me," Ron commented.

"I don't know. Perhaps they're-" Hermione stopped mid-sentence. The more-than-audible noise of the double doors opening had distracted her.

Silence descended on the room. Even the professors turned to look.

The doors swung slowly outward.

"I told you we should have gone with the crowd."

"Shut up! I'll find where we're supposed to be!"

"Umm..."

"What?"

"I think you just found it."

The strangest pair of students Hogwarts had ever seen entered the Great Hall.

The first, a boy in a knee-length crimson coat stepped in with a gaping mouth and incredulous eyes. He was extremely short, shorter than some of the first years, and wore thick-soled, black boots that gave him an extra inch or so. He had long, blonde hair that was braided in the back except for two loose, bang-like sections on either side of his face and hair that stood up like an antennae in the front. He wore black clothing that looked slightly like a military uniform, especially in the collar. A silver chain hung from his belt and looped around to the back of his pants. A stiff, brown suitcase was slung over his shoulder.

The second person to enter the Great Hall, however, was even more unusual. He was the exact opposite of the first, mainly because he was so enormous.

This figure was fitted head-to-toe in shining, silver armor. His chest was broad, and his breastplate was tapered to a protruding point in front of the collarbone. His head, or rather, his helmet was disproportionately small compared to his body and was adorned by a spike sticking out horizontally from the forehead and a long, white tassel shooting out from the back. The helmet had small eyeholes like circles with the top half cut off. Underneath each eye were two parallel slits, like cat whiskers or the black lines football players paint on their cheeks. The helmet also sported a rectangular, boxy chin-piece attached beneath a jagged metal edge similar to the teeth of a jack-o-lantern. There were three spikes on each massive shoulder, with others sprouting up from the feet and out of the knees, and also a few shooting back from the elbow joints. Over his armor, he wore, of all things, a pale blue loincloth.

_What kind of person is under that armor?_ Harry thought with alarm. _Who in the world are these people?_

Ron and Hermione seemed to be thinking the same thing as they stared with gaping mouths.

Noticing that the entire room was staring at him and his companion, the person in the armor gave a slight, seemingly-shy wave (although shyness couldn't be possible from someone wearing such frightening armor). The other one, however, grinned widely, gave a strangely condescending nod of greeting to the students, and advanced quickly towards the staff table. With his head up and with a confident stride, he marched straight up to Dumbledore, the armored figure following a few steps behind.

The boy with the red coat stopped and looked up at Dumbledore. The difference in height was almost comical. "You must be Headmaster Dumbledore, the one who sent us our letters. I apologize for our lateness, we had a bit of trouble locating where we were supposed to be."

He spoke in military fashion, loud and direct. Every student in the Great Hall could hear him.

Harry was stunned by the audacity of this stunted stranger. No student would dare approach Dumbledore with such a casual attitude of parity. Who was this boy?

Dumbledore accepted this formal locution with a jovial wave of the hand. "Not at all. We are delighted that you accepted the offer."

_Offer?_ wondered Harry.

"And may I be the first to welcome you to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I am indeed the Headmaster of this fine school, as you guessed. Albus Dumbledore."

The boy nodded his head by way of greeting. "Edward Elric, State Alchemist of Amestris. Pleased to meet you."

The armored figure stepped forward and offered his black-leather gloved hand. "Alphonse Elric of Amestris. Thank you very much for the invitation."

There were a few gasps scattered across the Great Hall. The armored person's voice was shockingly child-like. No one in the room had expected such a young person to be inside the armor.

Dumbledore had to look up to meet the gaze of the person inside the armor, but he nonetheless smiled and shook the colossal boy's hand. "Our pleasure. Now before we can do anything else, Elric brothers, there is one matter we must attend to."

The two Elrics exchanged a glance.

"Yes?" prompted the smaller of the two.

"We must have you both sorted into your Houses."

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><p><em>Finally!<em>

I'm sorry it took so long and I hope you all like it. I worked so hard on those char descriptions, trying to figure what was necessary now and what would be mentioned later. They're definitely long, no doubt about it.

**Clarifications:**  
>No prefect-ness in this alt. universe 5th year, it only would complicate things.<br>Also, Harry didn't have that hearing, but he probably did spend some time with Sirius at the house.  
>The reason there is no Sorting Hat song? Because I fail with rhymes. So I asked someone if they would write a relevant one for me. Hasn't replied with an answer yet. But I will edit this chapter when I have one.<p>

^^"

Many, many thanks to Yaruhi and Brainiac5, Brainiac5 who thought of such a crossover in the first place, and Yaruhi who helped with stuff I just had no idea about. Thanks so much guys!


	4. Sorted

**Chapter 4: Sorted**

"Huh?" the one named Edward blurted out.

Professor McGonagall stepped forward. "Headmaster Dumbledore, may I be permitted to take over from here?"

Dumbledore nodded and left to sit down at the staff table. McGonagall turned to look at the two Elrics. "Sorting is the process by which we assign you to what we call a house. There are four houses as shown by the four house flags."

The two Elrics looked out at the Great Hall. Sure enough there were four flags. Each one had a flag with different colors and an animal on it. Edward looked at each in turn.

There was a badger on a black and yellow flag.

Lame.

A raven on a blue and bronze colored flag.

A slightly better mascot, but it was still just a dumb bird.

A lion on a red and gold flag.

Very cool. Plus it got points for the colors.

A snake on a green and silver flag.

Now that was a mascot. It had a look in its eyes that made it appear ready to strike and the colors were fear-inducing. It was the epitome of awesome. Edward decided that this was his favorite.

Edward looked up at Alphonse. His brother was paying attention to what the strict-looking lady was saying. Edward directed his own attention to her as well.

"The badger is the symbol of the Hufflepuff house. Hufflepuffs are known for their diligence, justice, loyalty, and willingness to work hard. The raven is the symbol of the Ravenclaw house. Members of this house are known for their studiousness, intelligence, and willingness to obey rules. The lion is the symbol of the Gryffindor house. Gryffindors are known for their bravery, loyalty and bold determination. And finally, the serpent is the symbol of the Slytherin house. Slytherins are known for their cunning, strategy, ambition, and shrewdness"

_Slytherin. Great name,_thought Edward.

"And with that explained, we can now sort you each into your houses. We go in alphabetical order. So the first will be Mr. Alphonse. Please step forward and place the Sorting Hat on your… head."

Alphonse walked over to the stool with the old, pointy hat on it. He looked at the stool, decided not to risk sitting on it, and simply put the hat over his helmet. Impossibly, it slipped over the metal spike on his forehead and slid down to cover the entire helmet. The whole hall waited with bated breath.

Edward watched with interest. How would putting a ratty, old hat on your head 'sort' you into a house? And why did he hear mad cackles coming from underneath the hat? Alphonse wasn't the type to cackle.

A few seconds later a tear near the brim of the hat opened like a mouth, and a voice yelled out "HUFFLEPUFF!"

Nobody knew whether to clap or not at first, but after a few moments Hufflepuff house burst into cheers. The armored boy named Alphonse was odd one to say the least, but he was now an odd Hufflepuff, and all quirks would have to be forgiven now that they had him as a housemate. Plus, Hufflepuffs were not ones to judge by appearance.

Alphonse lifted the hat off his head and looked at Professor McGonagall. She nodded towards the cheering Hufflepuff table. Gently setting the Sorting Hat back on the stool, he walked over to a large empty spot at the Hufflepuff table that had been vacated just for him.

Edward felt the gazes of the audience turning back onto him as the woman in the pointy hat spoke to him. "Mr. Edward, you're next."

Edward advanced briskly to the hat on the stool. He picked it up and inspected the part where the tear had opened. Surely the voice he had heard came from a speaker of some sort. Seating himself on the stool, he stuck his hand inside the so called 'Sorting Hat' and reached all the way to the tip. There was nothing inside.

Frowning in confusion, Edward decided to give up and do as Alphonse had done. He set the hat on top of his head and frowned deeper when it slipped down to rest on his shoulders. Why couldn't the stupid hat fit?

_I feel like an idiot._

It was dark and stuffy inside the hat so of course Edward jumped when he heard a voice speaking in his ear.

"Sometimes feelings can be correct."

"What? Who's there?"

He heard a few giggles from the students.

"The Sorting Hat, fool. Pay attention when those who are wiser than you speak. I am the one who decides to which house you belong."

"Alright, _hat._Put me in Slytherin."

The hat cackled. "You're too brash for your own good. Let me have a moment to see what's inside your head."

Edward waited impatiently as the hat mumbled to itself. "So here's the brother of the first. They are very similar, very similar indeed… Interesting. Indeed, very interesting… What's this?... Well, well, well…" He went silent.

"Well? Put me in Slytherin already!"

"You're quite a mysterious student, aren't you? As I said already, you are too hasty for your own good. But hastiness is sometimes more valuable than cautiousness, which can often cause a valuable opportunity to pass by."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sort me already."

"Of course, as you wish," the hat said sarcastically. "I know exactly which house you belong to."

Edward grinned in the darkness. He would get his wish.

The hat paused a moment, and yelled out "GRYFFINDOR!"

"What?" Edward jumped off the stool and pulled the Sorting Hat off his head. No one was cheering.

"You stupid hat! I said Slytherin! Slytherin!" He slammed the hat back onto the bench and looked out at the audience. Every student at every table stared at him with wide eyes and jaws dropped. He located the table with the lion flag and stomped grumpily over to it. The Gryffindors on the left side parted to let him have a seat. The spot they cleared was wider than the one made for Alphonse. Edward sat down and immediately slouched forward to set his head on the table. His features scrunched up into a pout.

All the students were ruffled by this outburst. They sat in shocked silence until Dumbledore took advantage of the lull. He rose from his chair and addressed the whole school. "Now that you have all been properly sorted, it is time for us sort through our dinner. So sort away!"

At the mention of food, everyone perked up, even Edward. The students began to cheer and suddenly mountains of food appeared on golden plates on each table. The uncomfortable atmosphere cleared; conversations sprouted anew. Everyone piled food onto their golden plates and poured their favorite drinks into golden goblets.

Still in shock from the mountain of chicken legs that had suddenly appeared a foot away from his face, Edward cautiously picked up his plate and flipped it over, inspecting it. He tapped it with a white-gloved left hand and noted the noise it made. Then he tapped it with his white-gloved right hand. It made a clinking noise this time. He looked across the table at the three students who were the only ones not to move away when he had sat down.

"Is this _real_ gold?"

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><p>Hello, all! For some reason, I feel rather paranoid about this chapter... But as I read it, it seems fine. Maybe that's what happens when I compose an entire chapter in one day and decide to publish it that same day. It seems rushed. But that's because I'm soo slow normally. Yes, this chapter may seem short to all of you, but with my pace, this is a lot. And I was rather busy today. Next chapter will not come as fast as this one did.<p>

Yeah, so, this chapter... Umm, you can complain, comment, or ask about anything: houses they were placed in, behavior of the characters, dialogue, point of view, names...

**Clarifications:  
><strong>-I call Ed 'Edward' because to the characters he has not been introduced as 'Ed' yet. Same goes for Al.  
>-The point of view changes for each chapter. This chapter, clearly, is Ed's POV. If you have any comments about how I am half-narrating half-letting-the-character's-POV-narrate, please tell me. I would love someone else's view.<p>

Comments welcome! Constructive criticism as well!

Thanks again to Yaruhi and Brainiac5 :)


	5. Dinner

**Chapter 5: Dinner**

**.**

**.**

Ron had spent the entire second part of the Sorting Ceremony with his mouth hanging open. He hadn't believed his eyes when he had seen these two new students for the first time, and he had believed his ears even less when he heard the Sorting Hat had proclaimed the short, loud one a Gryffindor. Hadn't Dumbledore said that the two new students would be joining fifth year…?

And now, with this strange 'Edward' person sitting in front of him, Harry, and Hermione, asking them if the clearly golden plate was made of gold? It was unreal.

"Errr…" Ron managed to reply after a prolonged silence.

His utterance seemed to snap Harry and Hermione out of a trance.

"Edward, right?" Harry asked.

"Just Ed."

"Alright… Ed... It's real gold," Harry affirmed.

Edward's eyes went large. "Really? And you eat on it? "

They nodded perplexedly. It wasn't that surprising of a fact, was it?

"And the food?" He pointed at the loaded plates on the table. "It just appeared on the table. Is it real? Is it edible?"

"Yes…" Ron replied slowly.

"Sweet!" Ed started piling his plate with victuals.

Realizing his hunger, Ron decided to do the same. He wouldn't let anyone keep him from eating a full meal, no matter how odd they were. Harry and Hermione stopped staring at Ed long enough to fill their plates as well. Ed abandoned asking questions so he could eat.

Hermione seemed more curious about than disquieted by Ed's presence. She kept looking over at him as though she wanted to ask him something. But she always stopped herself. _No, I can't ask that. That would be too rude. But how to word it?_

Ron theorized while chowing down on a particularly chewy pork chop with mashed potatoes and bean casserole. _Who in the world is this midget? He wanted to be a Slytherin of all things! And his outfit is bizarre. What kind of a person goes around in such bright color? And his older 'brother'? Is he half-giant like Hagrid? Is he really ugly? Is that why he's in the armor? And what's up with all those spikes? _

"Excuse me," Hermione suddenly said, setting her fork down. Time to get down to business.

Ron stopped with his fork halfway to his mouth. Harry stopped with his fork in a bowl of meatballs. Ed stopped with his fork **in** his mouth.

"But I wanted to ask you a question."

"Sure, but who are you?" Ed mumbled around the fork, his eyebrows raised.

"Hermione Granger. But I was wondering-" She paused for a moment, choosing her words carefully. "What it means to be 'coming to Hogwarts for research purposes'?"

_Aw, man. I was hoping she would ask why he wanted to be in Slytherin. Either that or about the kid in the armor, _thought Ron.

"Well," Ed said after removing the fork from his mouth and chewing his food, "my superiors heard about this place somehow and wanted to know more about it. So they contacted your headmaster. All we were told is that there's some mutual reason for sending my brother and I here for a year. They hinted that there might even be something in it for us too. I dunno."

"Superiors?" Harry inquired.

"Yeah, I work for the state back in Amestris. Practically everyone's my superior back there."

"Is Amestris an all-wizard state, or do the Muggles not know that you're a wizard?" Hermione asked, hoping for clarification

Ed gave Hermione a blank stare. "What? Wizard state?"

Harry and Ron exchanged a glance.

Hermione looked puzzled. "So it's not a wizard state?"

"Wait, **wizard**?"

Ron nearly choked. "But you're here! Hogwarts! The greatest wizarding school in the whole world! Aren't you a wizard?"

Ed stared angrily at Ron. "Everyone seems to be saying 'wizard' but I'm **not** a wizard! I'm an **alchemist**!"

Ron, Harry, and Hermione's eyes went wide.

"An alchemist? But you're not old enough! You have to graduate from a wizarding school before you can get a license for alchemy," Harry said. How in the world?

The short blonde rolled his eyes condescendingly. "I got my state alchemist permit when I was twelve. And you don't need to be a wizard to be an alchemist. Okay?"

_So if he's an alchemist, then that explains why he was asking about the gold. _Hermione added this fact to her mental profile of Edward. _He seems to be very intelligent and curious. He __**has**__ to have been well educated in wizarding, but why does he keep denying that he's a wizard? He's obviously a genius becoming an alchemist at this age. But why would he go into the alchemical arts without some foundation in wizarding? And he __**works**__ for a non-wizard state. It's possible that rational thought is his modus operandi. That combined with skill and natural intelligence could land him a job at such a young age. Either that or he's older and more mature than he looks._

"But **why**-" Ron suddenly blurted out, "-do you want to be a Slytherin? A Slytherin of all things!"

"Because the Slytherin house looks cool," Ed said in a 'no, duh' tone of voice.

Hermione choked on her pumpkin juice. "**Cool**? That's why?" _I'm lost again. What kind a person is he?_

"Then why didn't the Sorting Hat put you in Slytherin?" Ron asked, thinking that this midget seemed like a perfect Slytherin.

"That's what I'd like to know!" Ed rolled his eyes. "I find the whole system of 'sorting' ridiculous. Why can't everyone just choose which one they want to go in?"

"Because that's not how they do it!" Hermione exclaimed as she slapped her hands palm down onto the table. "The Sorting Hat doesn't just put you in whatever House you want! It looks at your talents, skills, and personality!"

_Wow, Hermione's really getting into this,_ observed Harry calmly. _Ron too. This kid is weird for wanting to go into Slytherin, but he doesn't seem anywhere as vile as Malfoy. Maybe he was just misinformed. _He started to say something but was interrupted by Ron.

"Yeah! And Ed, your personality is suspiciously Slytherin-like." Ron narrowed his eyes at the boy across the table.

"What's the big deal with Slytherin?" Ed seriously didn't know what was the big problem.

"Well-" Harry started before anyone else could get a word in. He looked nervously at Ron, who was still glaring at Ed. "Let's just say Slytherins don't get along well with anyone and switch topics."

Ed gave Ron a strange look and then returned to eating.

"So, Ed," Hermione started inquisitively. "Are either of your parents wizards?"

"No," he said without even looking up.

"Ah." _That's all I get? No? _"Neither are mine, actually. They're both dentists. It's rather a bother if you ever bring home sweets. What do your parents do?"

Ed didn't respond for a few moments. "Nothing, really."

"Oh?" Hermione looked puzzled.

"Neither of them supports my brother and me, if that's what you're asking. We don't live with either of them."

"Oh…" That stopped Hermione in her tracks. Clearly, it was a private matter.

Hermione was perturbed with herself for having asked the wrong sort of question. _Now I can't ask any more without being rude. If only Harry would say something. He's good at this sort of thing. _

For once in her life, Hermione was glad when Fred and George stood up and strutted over. They seated themselves one on either side of Ed. The blonde boy ignored them and continued eating.

"Ron, you look rather peeved. Wouldn't you agree, Fred?" George noted.

"Yes, I would. Wonder what's gotten his knickers in a twist? You know, Ronnykins, that it's bad to eat with a sour face," Fred replied.

"Bad for the digestion as I recall." George patted his stomach illustratively.

Even more irritated, Ron glowered at them. Couldn't they just shut up for once?

"And this handsome lad is called Edward, correct?" George turned to Ed, who continued eating and only acknowledged the question with a quick glance at the tall red-head.

"Yes," Harry replied, seeing that Ed wasn't going to.

"Well, hello Edward, pleasure meeting you." George would have shaken his hand had Edward not been hunched unsociably over his plate.

"Likewise." Fred chimed in. "Lovely red robes you're wearing, don't know how you got away with it."

"It's not a **robe**, it's a jacket."

"Rather long jacket, wouldn't you say?" George noted.

"And what's up with this fearsome symbol on the back?" Fred traced the outline in the air. "Appears to be a winged, black snake shaped like a question mark on a cross beneath a crown."

"Dreadfully Slytherin-esque."

"See, Harry! I told you! He's probably descended from a long line of Slytherins," Ron whispered fiercely.

"Sirius is from a long line of Slytherins too," Harry reminded him. "And he became a Gryffindor. I don't think the Sorting Hat chooses wrong."

Fred and George looked at each other and winked connivingly.

"If you don't mind me asking, how old are you, Ed?" asked Fred with an innocent look on his face.

"Fifteen."

"Hmm, same age as these three," George observed.

"That old, eh? What a tragedy." Fred shook his head.

"Do you think he knows?" George asked in a stage whisper.

"It doesn't seem like he does. Should I break the news to him?"

"Gently. We wouldn't want him to go into shock."

Fred leaned closer to Ed and gave him a somber look. "Edward, I'm sorry to break the news to you like this, but, you're rather **short** for your age."

The murderous glare that appeared in Edward's eyes as he mechanically turned his head stopped Fred entirely.

Without warning, Ed burst out at a ridiculously loud volume "Who are you calling a midget too small to even reach the sink without a step?" He brought his fork up threateningly close to Fred's face.

Fred leaned back panicking and lifted his hands. "I didn't say that! Calm down!" But after a brief second he looked down at fork and snickered. "Wait, I thought that was your wand! It's just a fork!"

George laughed. "We use forks to eat with! Do Muggles use them as weapons?"

A great shadow suddenly loomed over the two of them. Everyone looked up.

The boy called Alphonse looked down at Edward with his humongous metal-covered arms crossed. Somehow, everyone could tell that even his expression was stern just by looking at him.

_Aha, the older brother, _thought Ron. _Now Ed's busted. _

"**Ed**, put the fork **down**."

Ron was still shocked at how young the voice coming out of the armor sounded. _Poor guy, I bet he gets teased._

Edward huffily dropped the fork onto the table and went back to his original spot on the bench. He muttered to himself "…just wanted to eat my food…can't get a moment of peace here… insulted everywhere I go…"

The armored boy turned to the rest of the group, his massive arms unfolding, his unseen features somehow noticeably softening. He bowed his head slightly. "I'm sorry for my big brother's behavior."

"Big brother?" Ron couldn't help but blurt out.

Everyone's eyes went wide.

"Yes," he nodded. "I'm Alphonse Elric, the younger brother. May I sit here?" He motioned to the spot to the left of Ed.

George nodded and scooted over a considerable distance.

With no difficulty, Alphonse set himself down on the bench. It didn't bend with strain as much as one would have guessed it would. But no one noticed that. They were all too puzzled at Alphonse's statement.

"Are you three brothers?" Alphonse pointed at Fred, George, and Ron.

"Yes," said Fred. "We're two of Ron's older brothers, Fred and George Weasley."

"And you two?"

"I'm Harry."

"Hermione Granger."

"Pleased to meet you," Alphonse said genially. "We're very glad to be attending this school. I'm sure we'll learn a lot here." At that moment every person looking at him could have sworn that his face was glowing with sincere joy.

Hermione decided to make conversation with this obviously more responsive brother. "So, do you work for your state as well?"

"Oh, no, I couldn't become a dog of the military and keep a clear conscience," Alphonse laughed, meaning the statement as a lighthearted joke.

However, no one noticed he was kidding. Hermione gulped. Ron wondered what in the world that implied about Ed.

Ed spoke up without looking at his brother. "Why aren't you sitting with your house, Al?"

"Because it was lonely," Alphonse said mopily. "Everyone was having fun talking and eating, and I couldn't. I could only sit there."

"Why can't you eat?" Harry inquired.

"Ah, er, well-" stuttered Al.

"He's got a parasite in his stomach!" Ed interrupted frantically.

"Oh?" George raised his eyebrows.

"Is that so?" Fred mirrored George's expression.

"Yes," Ed said definitively and proceeded to shovel food into his mouth in an attempt to avoid any more questions.

"A strapping young fellow like you-"

"-unable to eat to keep up all that muscle."

"By the way-" Ron suddenly interrupted. "-_why_ do you wear all that armor?"

Alphonse laughed uncomfortably and scratched the back of his neck (a fruitless endeavor for someone wearing armor). "It's an… experiment."

"Ah." Ron nodded his head like that explained everything. _He's lying, no doubt about it._

The food on the table disappeared abruptly, and was replaced with dessert. Once again, Edward was taken by surprise. All the tables in the Great Hall were now covered in an impressive amount of pies, cakes, tarts, jellies, and sweets. One very large pumpkin pie topped with whipped cream and cinnamon was now in front of Ron.

Everyone was distracted by this switch and dropped all conversation in order to more effectively load their plates. Ron was annoyed when he noticed that Ed **also** was loading his own plate with some of everything in reach. Regretfully but rebelliously, he skipped the candied walnuts, just to be different.

After about ten minutes, when the eating had finally slowed, Headmaster Dumbledore stood from his seat and walked up to his podium. The whole room went quiet

"Now that you have all had a chance to eat, it is once again time for the start-of-term notices. First of all, I would like our first-years and other new students to know that the forest in the grounds is out of bounds to all students. This rule applies, indeed to **all** students. Mr. Filch, our caretaker, would like me to remind you as well that no magic is allowed in the hallways, nor are any other magical mess-makers. For a list of the objects **not** allowed, refer to the list posted on Mr. Filch's door.

"We have one change in staff this year. Our new Defense against the Dark Arts teacher was not able to make it here tonight, but will most certainly be prepared for classes tomorrow morning.

"Tryouts for the House Quidditch teams will take place on-"

"That didn't give us very much information," Harry whispered to Ron.

"What sort of teacher do you suppose he'll be?" Ron asked.

"It doesn't necessarily have to be a 'he'," Hermione interrupted. "Dumbledore avoided using a pronoun. It could be a woman."

"A female Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher," said Ron. "Can you imagine that? I bet she'd be beastly."

"But all in all," Dumbledore concluded. "I wish you all another very productive year at Hogwarts. And with that, I bid you good night." He gave a small bow as the four heads of houses arose from their seats to help shepherd students out of the Great Hall.

A few prefects did the same. "First year Gryffindors over here!" yelled a tall, blonde boy. The first years, small and frightened, conglomerated in a big group around him. "Follow me to the Gryffindor dorms!" He set off out the double doors behind a group of Ravenclaw first years.

"Well, we're off," George said. He and Fred slipped into the masses.

Now left nearly all alone with Edward and Alphonse, Ron, Hermione, and Harry were unsure of what to do. No one else seemed to be in charge of showing them where to go, but none of them wanted to take the responsibility.

But just at that moment, McGonagall, head of Gryffindor house, walked up and solved their problem. "Elric and Elric, the headmaster would like to have a word with you before letting you retire to your dorms. Could you please follow me to his office?"

"Ah, yes." Alphonse turned to Harry, Ron, and Hermione. "Nice meeting you." He bowed his head slightly and followed his brother and Professor McGonagall.

"Alphonse is a polite sort of fellow, isn't he?" commented Ron to Harry. "Not like his **brother**. Can you believe that? The titchy little fellow is the older brother!"

"You might not want to say that when he's around," Hermione cautioned. "Edward's got quite the Napoleon complex."

Ron gave her a strange look. "Is that a Muggle term?"

"Napoleon was an important figure in European history. Granted, he wasn't a wizard, but his actions still affect our history. He was known for being rather short, which is where the term…" she trailed off when she noticed Ron's eyes glazing over. "Fine. I'm just answering your question."

"Yeah, but please don't turn this into one of Professor Binn's lessons. If the history of magic can be so boring, the history of Muggles is three times that."

"It's not **that** boring, Ron."

Ron gave Harry a look that said '_Yes it is'_ and started walking out of the Great Hall, Harry and Hermione following right behind him.

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><p>CHAPTER FIVE! YOU'VE WAITED LONG ENOUGH, RIGHT?<br>School is murder. There, that's my excuse.  
>Ahahaha, yeah. It's finally here. It's only through all the help from Brainiac5 and Yaruhi that I finished this. Soooo many edits. *shiver*<br>I tried to be very true to the characters, I hope that was evident. Lots of mystery, too.

CLARIFICATIONS:

1. Most all questions will be answered in future chapters.  
>2. My perspectivePOV system changed- we now can hear multiple character's thoughts in each chapter.


	6. The Headmaster's Office

**Chapter 6: The Headmaster's Office**

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Alphonse and Edward followed Professor McGonagall out of the Great Hall. Everyone stopped and stared as Alphonse clanked in his hurry to keep up with her. Ed just stuck his hands in his pocket and walked at a leisurely pace, looking up at the high ceiling as they travelled up a large marble staircase. They passed down a long corridor until they came to a large oak door.

"Do you suppose she might be taking us to the dungeons?" Ed asked his brother in a low voice. "This big of a castle has to have a pretty big dungeon."

"Don't be silly, Ed. She's taking us to the headmaster's office."

"Ri-ight…"

Professor McGonagall knocked four times and then opened it to reveal a staircase leading up. She turned to the boys. "None of the students know about this staircase. I trust you to keep quiet about it." They nodded.

At the top of the stairs they came out in another deserted corridor. They turned right, then left. Professor McGonagall stopped a few yards ahead of them in front of an ugly gargoyle statue. "Mellow Bellows," she stated with dignity.

_What?_ thought Alphonse. He didn't understand what the purpose of this action was until the gargoyle leapt aside and the wall opened, revealing a slowly rotating, spiral staircase. _Wait, how did she make that gargoyle move? Is it mechanical? And the moving staircase- how does that work? _He looked to his brother. Ed was staring up at the ceiling again, apparently he had missed it.

"Follow me," Professor McGonagall commanded. She stepped onto the staircase and spun out of sight.

"Ed, you go first."

"Eh?" Edward dropped his gaze and looked quizzically at Alphonse. Finally, he noticed the staircase. "Oh. Right." He hopped on.

Alphonse looked left and right and followed his brother. The wall closed behind him as he spun around.  
>Ed was waiting on a landing in front of an open door. He went through it once he saw that Al was safely up.<p>

Except he had to stop.

The large, circular room was filled with a variety of objects, and the majority of them were in motion. Things spun; knickknacks flashed. Impossible contraptions hovered midair above their heads. Paintings of sleeping people with funny, pointed hats lined the walls all the way up to the high ceiling.

Headmaster Dumbledore sat behind a massive, claw-footed desk, but rose when the Elric brothers entered the room.

"May I say again, welcome, Edward and Alphonse."

Edward momentarily swiveled his head as Professor McGonagall exited the room.

"I will not waste your time, I know that you must be very tired, Edward." He purposefully directed the comment to Ed and only Ed. Alphonse wondered how much Dumbledore knew.

"As you are both joining our school at the fifth year level, you must know that you will need extra course work alongside your classes with the other fifth years. It should be no trouble for you."

_Extra class work… sounds like fun… _Ed scratched his nose.

"Professor McGonagall and Professor Sprout will give you your class schedules tomorrow with the extra classes listed. But there is also the trouble of supplies." Dumbledore peered down his nose at the boys. "Neither of you have wands, nor any other supplies needed to complete your class work efficiently. For the week, you may borrow what you need but on the weekend we shall have to send you to Diagon Alley. The teachers know you two are special cases and if you explain to them, I'm sure they will concede to your needs."

_Where's Diagon Alley? _thought Al.

Ed yawned offhandedly.

"Patience, Edward. I have only a few more matters to address," Dumbledore said kindly. "Now I know neither of you have grown up knowing of wizards and magic, but I'm sure you will adjust soon enough. Amestrian alchemy and magic are very similar in some aspects. If you need any help, you know where to find me, but your House Heads would also be more than willing to assist you." He folded his hands. "I believe that is all. Do either of you have any questions?"

_Actually I have a lot…_ Alphonse decided to just ask two.

"Were you informed about our situation and will you be telling the students?"

Edward suddenly paid strict attention to the conversation.

Dumbledore smiled slightly. "I do indeed know the true reason why you are here, but I intend to keep it to myself. Not even the teachers know. I leave it to your discretion."

"Thank you, Headmaster Dumbledore." Alphonse bowed his head politely.

"Now go get some rest, you're going to need all your strength tomorrow." Dumbledore made shooing motions with his hands.

Edward followed his brother out the door and back down to the hallway.

"Where do we go now?" he asked.

"Mr. Edward Elric, follow me please," called Professor McGonagall suddenly from their left. "Mr. Alphonse Elric, Professor Sprout will be only a minute if you don't mind waiting."

"Bye, Ed," said Alphonse. "I guess being in different houses means different rooms. See you at breakfast?"

"Yeah," Edward yelled over his shoulder as he walked away.

Al watched Edward disappear around the corner and then looked around for Professor Sprout. Someone was coming down the dimly lit corridor to the right. She was a stout woman with frizzy, grey hair and a pointy hat that was shorter than the ones Alphonse had seen before.

"Alphonse, is it? Come with me. We need to get you to bed before you drop from exhaustion."

Alphonse didn't bother to tell her that him dropping from exhaustion wasn't likely and simply walked silently behind her, adjusting his pace to match her speed. They went down the hall until it opened up. Only then did Alphonse realize they were in a tower. Walls covered in paintings soared upwards from the floor far below. There were massive stone staircases everywhere. Al watched as, inexplicably, one staircase moved away from a landing and shifted to the right to reach another landing.

_We must be six floors up,_ thought Al. _How did we get up here so fast when we were with Professor McGonagall? _He realized that Professor Sprout was going down a staircase and quickly followed her.

The walls on his left were lined with paintings of various people. Their eyes seemed to watch as Al passed by. He stopped for a second to look at a picture of a woman by a wishing well with one cat in her arms and another clinging to her shoulder.

The woman winked at him.

Al stepped back in shock. The cat on the woman's shoulder jumped to the ground and started licking its paw.

_What?_ Alphonse couldn't believe his eyes. The figures in the painting were moving! He looked at the other paintings. They actually **had** been looking at him! They blinked and moved to whisper things to each other. One waved at him. Tentatively, he waved back.

Al continued down the stairs, his attention glued to the wall and all the moving paintings on it. Thankfully, none of the stairs moved while he was on it.

When he and Professor Sprout had finally reached ground level, she led him down the marble staircase and down another staircase to the left of it.

There were no windows on this level. Torches lit the lonely, wide corridor. They turned right and walked until they came to a stack of colossal barrels in a shadowy alcove.

"Now watch carefully. You're going to need to remember this," Professor Sprout commanded. "Find the middle barrel, two from the bottom." She pointed at the lid. "And now you knock. But you have to do it just right. The Hufflepuff house was founded by a witch named Helga Hufflepuff. In honor of her, you must knock to the rhythm of her name. Any other beat will cause unwanted results."

She knocked on the lid. Tap-tap, Tap-tap-tap. The lid swung open, revealing a large, dark tunnel.

"Will you fit?" Professor Sprout asked with concern.

"I think so." Al bent over and went in. His armor scraped the sides of the tunnel but he could walk without trouble. He only had to travel like this for a few seconds before he saw the opening from which a warm, honey-colored glow emanated.

Stepping out of the tunnel, Alphonse found himself in a spacious, cozy, cave-like room. There were comfy chairs everywhere and the room was filled with potted plants.

"This is the Hufflepuff common room. That way-" Professor Sprout pointed to a round door on the left side of the room "-goes to the girl's dormitory. The other door leads to the boys dormitory. Each tunnel branches off seven ways; as you are a fifth year, you will take the fifth tunnel. Your things have already been put by your bed." She stopped and looked up at the ceiling, counting off on her fingers. "I believe that's all. Do you have any questions?"

Alphonse shook his helmeted head.

"Good." Professor Sprout smiled. "Make sure to get to bed right now, you're going to need your sleep for tomorrow." She left the room.

Al stood quietly for a few moments, looking at the dimly lit common room. Finally he moved over to a chair and sat down, his armor clanking ever so slightly. He didn't want to go into his dorm room if he wasn't going to sleep.

A few of the plants shifted in their pots as he sat in silence, waiting for morning to come.

Edward had had a completely different experience on his journey to the Gryffindor common room. When he left with Professor McGonagall, she led him back down the secret staircase and down a corridor he hadn't been through yet. Ed was practically sleepwalking he was so tired.

After more than fifteen minutes Professor McGonagall finally stopped. Ed opened his eyes. A fat woman in a pink dress sat looking out of the frame. "Password?" she asked.

Ed jerked wide awake.

"Mimbulus Mimbletonia," Professor McGonagall stated.

"Correct." The painting swung aside to reveal a large hole in the wall.

"Edward, I must leave you here. Your things are up in your room; go up the stairs on the right to the fifth year boys' dorm room. If you have any questions, ask Potter and Weasley, they're in fifth year as well. I expect you to be up early and eager to learn tomorrow. Good night." She started walking back the way she had come.

"Yeah." Edward eyed the painting and went into the common room.

The only light came from a roaring fireplace across the room. Ed rubbed his eyes and looked for the stairs. The warmth was making him even more tired.

Ed slowly made his way up to the fifth year dorm room at the top of a spiral staircase. Barely noticing the other sleeping figures in the circular room, he sat down on the only unoccupied bed, took his boots and jacket off, and pushed his way under the covers. He was asleep in less than three seconds.

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><p>Hello y'all! It's been a while :D I love you guys so much that I finished this chapter during finals week. Yeah. That's how much I love you. And I'm posting this when I should be studying more for my tests.<p>

Errrr, this chapter took a lot of research for trying to figure out how to get them wherever without revealing too much about whatnot and whichthat...yes, it's a made up word.

**Clarifications:**  
>-I got my info for the Hufflepuff common room off of the HP wiki page and the hp-lexicon, info which mainly comes from Pottermore. I'm not an expert in every aspect of the HP universe in any way, shape, or form.<br>-The secret magic passageway that takes you up to Dumbledore's office is created. Apparently only certain teachers know about it (but trust me, Fred and George do too)  
>-Anybody notice what was in the painting that Alphonse stopped to look at?<br>-I keep switching what I call them: Ed/Edward Al/Alphonse. Does it bug anyone? Because honestly, I like doing it this way.

Shout out to Brainiac5, I think you know why by now.

I'll answer any questions you have. Thanks for reading!

Next chapter?_ LESSONS_. *cue suspenseful music*


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